Anthony Bourdain’s Five Golden Rules Of Eating Out

  1. Eating is a submissive act. Assume the chef knows what he does well better than you do and ask for a tasting menu. 
  2. Avoid menus that try to be everything to everybody. The smaller the menu, the better. The perfect restaurant would only have one dish: “We have ramen noodle soup, but it’s the best damn ramen noodle soup in New York.” 
  3. Simple is hard to do right. A bad chef with no pride can find a way to fuck up anything. 
  4. If you see a chicken Caesar, it’s time to get up and run. 
  5. Forget about eating out on weekends; those are amateur nights. Tuesday through Thursday nights around 9:30 is when you should be going out to dinner—you’re not going to be in the mosh pit with all the people who are in town to see The Lion King.

I love this and couldn't agree more with Mr. Bourdain. My biggest pet peeve is when people try to change dishes at great restaurants. Try something new! Take risks! You may actually find something you never even knew you would like, and I guarantee, almost always, the dish is better the way the chef intended it.